I mean, holy shit... we ran a total of three calls that day - pretty slow. They didn't feel like going to the fire station we were assigned to, so we sat out in the parking lot of a nearby Texaco for three and a half hours. Yes, three and a half hours. One of em' read the local "Pennysaver" newspaper and the other one just sat there and stared out the window.
If any of you ever saw the Seinfeld episode where Elaine and Putty were on the airplane together and Putty just sat there and stared at the seat in front of him, that's what it reminded me of. I just had the overwhelming desire to make cricket noises. Ugh.. oh well. Hopefully, I won't have to ride with those guys again. They were nice, I guess, just boring.
I'm nearing the end of my EMT class and will be spending a lot more time on the truck here in the near future, so I should have plenty of time to write and plenty of new material here in the next few weeks.
In the meantime, I'd like to post a couple of stories that an ER nurse friend of mine sent me. They're pretty funny..... When you read them, it will remind you to think twice before you talk about how bad of a day you had at the office.
One day we got a woman in for bowel evacuation. She weighed over 450 lbs and it was dangerous to even have her on a stretcher. They make special beds for the obese but not stretchers. (Editors note: They make em' now... we've got one that'll carry up to 1500 pounds) She was so big that we couldn't raise the siderails......somebody had to stand on the other side from me and keep her from falling off. We finally got her on her left side and I was ready to start the enemas. I couldn't find her anus. I had to use my left shoulder to hold up her right buttock so I could examine her. It was the only time that I ever needed ALL the enema tubing. I removed with my whole arm and hand some stool and began giving her the solution. The enema solution would not stay in. It ran out almost as fast as it went in. I tried holding her buttocks together around the tubing and put her in trendelenburg position (feet raised). She retained some of the solution and all of a sudden the other nurse and I saw the rapid return of water but heard a "Ping, Ping, Ping". I looked over my shoulder and saw three watermelon seeds on the wall behind me. It was all we could do to keep our composure. She couldn't walk but obviously someone was taking her plenty of food----even watermelon.
I was taking care of a face and head burn in the er one day. A radiator had overheated and the man took the cap off spaying hot fluid on his face,ear, neck and scalp. As I was dressing him one of our frequent visitors came in and was put in the cubicle beside us. Her chief complaint was,"I's gots Gas" The nurse asked what had caused the gas and she said "I ett cabbage and boiled aigs." The doctor came in and told her he would do some tests for gallbladder disease. "BLADDER,BLADDER I ain't got no trouble with my BLADDER---I's got gas." He left and as the er was very busy it was a while before anyone came back in. I went for more supplies and returned to find my patient crying and his wife unable to talk. Finally she was able to tell me that the patient called out to her family STAND BACK STAND BACK ----HERE IT COMES-HERE IT COMES-HERE IT COMES! And then she farted.
Pretty funny, eh? Oh yeah, check out the latest post over at Monkeygirl's blog.... it's pretty good. Makes you wanna work in the ER.
Public Service Announcement
Pretty funny, eh? Oh yeah, check out the latest post over at Monkeygirl's blog.... it's pretty good. Makes you wanna work in the ER.
Public Service Announcement
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